A Mother’s Day Gift of Hope for Worried Mothers and Grandmothers

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Posted by Karen Kinnaird, May 9, 2023

As I spend time at the table at Touching Hearts, it is not uncommon to hear a worried woman share her burden for a child in her family who has lost their way. At the ministry I work for, it is also not uncommon for a mother, grandmother, or even great-grandmother to call asking for help. The situations vary, but the pain in their voices is unmistakably the same. I know because I have been one of those mothers.

Uncertainty and fear can consume the heart of a mother whose child has lost their way. Amidst others’ joy and celebration, especially around Mother’s Day and graduation season, this pain intensifies as we long to see our child restored to God, their family, and the healthy, godly life God intends for them.

In the book Prodigals and Those Who Love Them, Ruth Bell Graham writes from her own pain as two of her five children experienced what she refers to as “spiritual wandering.” In this book, she wisely distinguishes between the possible and the impossible; the things mothers can do and the things only God can do. How often does a frantic, frenzied mother cross a boundary out of fear and desperation and try to manipulate and force the impossible, only to make things worse for her and her child? There is great comfort and freedom for the mother who can distinguish between the two.

WHAT CAN ONLY GOD DO?

1. Convict of sin

2. Create a hunger for righteousness

3. Convert

“He will convict the world of guilt in regard to sin and righteousness and judgment.” (John 16:8)

“No one can come to Me unless the Father who sent me draws him.” (John 6:44)

WHAT CAN MOTHERS DO?

1. We can tell our children we love them. We can affirm them and reinforce good decisions.

2. We can minister to physical and emotional needs however appropriate and as we are able.

3. We can pray urgently and consistently in faith, trusting God with the outcome, no matter what it is.

Ruth Bell Graham stated it well, “As a mother, I must faithfully, patiently, lovingly, and happily do my part–then quietly wait for God to do His.”

As in the parable of the lost sheep in Luke 15, the shepherd leaves the ninety-nine and goes after the one lost sheep until he finds it. Our God, who intentionally and tenderly searches for the lost one, possesses an extraordinary love. We must remember that He is working even when we don’t see it or feel it. We must be patient to give Him the time He needs to accomplish what He desires—in His unique way and His perfect timing.

Mom, Satan may whisper that you’re alone and you are the only one trying to find her way through this dark valley. He may whisper that you’ve blown it; that you’re a bad mother; that you should have done things differently; that everything you did right to raise your child was in vain. Perhaps he’s telling you it’s too late, or there’s no hope. In the midst of your tears, don’t believe the lies. As long as there is breath, there is hope.

This Mother’s Day, give yourself the gift of resting in the hope and knowledge that God, the very source of life, is present with your child. Untie the bow, rip off the wrapping paper, throw off the lid, and accept the gift! Give yourself the gift of releasing your child to Jesus, getting out of the way, and letting God accomplish the impossible.

“God, give me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference.” -Reinhold Neibuhr

Check out this song by Laura Story https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RI7B7q3pGvA

Karen Kinnaird currently serves as the Executive Assistant for Forgiving Forward Ministries. She has been a minister’s wife for nearly 38 years and has served on local church staff and state denominational positions. An award winning blogger, Karen has a passion for encouraging women searching for hope. Karen and her husband Jimmy moved to the Atlanta area in 2021 from Oklahoma City where he now serves as the Association Missionary Strategist for Fairburn Baptist Association. Karen and Jimmy, also known as Gigi and Poppy, have 3 children and 3 grandchildren.

Healing My Heart Step by Small Step

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Posted by Pat Elsberry, May 3, 2023

He is close to the broken-hearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. (Psalm 34:18)

A few years ago, I found myself walking a path no one ever dreams of taking– the grief journey due to child loss. Although death is part of the circle of life, child loss, which is an out-of-order death, is particularly heartbreaking.

When my daughter Melanie ran ahead to heaven unexpectedly, my heart was broken in a way I had never imagined it could be. Yet God, in all of his magnificence and wonder, immediately covered me in a way that could only be described as miraculous. A scripture I had heard hundreds of times became more than words on a page in the Bible. It became real and was felt deep within my being.

And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:7 NKJV)

This doesn’t mean I didn’t shed buckets of tears, but I continued to feel his presence on those dark days. It was like a shield surrounding and protecting me.

It’s been said that grief is like the ocean. It comes in waves; you don’t know if they will be strong or gentle. When the waves threatened to take me under, I would cry out to Jesus. He knows what it feels like to lose a loved one. Even though he knew the final outcome, didn’t he weep when his dear friend Lazarus died? Yes, he knows what loss feels like. When our loved ones move to heaven, no matter how much we may try, there is no rushing through the grief journey or going around it.

Instead, we must walk through it and let our Heavenly Father heal our hearts, step by small step.

One day a few months after Melanie died, I was having a tough day. Everyone seemed to be going about their own lives without a care in the world, and here I was, sitting outside on my deck with tears streaming down my face. Grief can be a very lonely place. During this low moment, I cried out to the Lord. I missed my daughter so much, and amid my tears, I asked him how I would fill this enormous void now that my girl was gone? Within a few moments, the sweet gentleness of the Holy Spirit whispered to my heart: “I’ll never let you down. I’ll never walk off and leave you” (Hebrews 13:5 MSG).

Wow! What an incredible comfort to know we are truly never really alone. If you have found yourself walking this grief journey, be kind and gentle with yourself. Lean into The One who made you. Jesus is walking alongside us; when we need it, he will carry us through the valley of the shadow of death.

Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil; you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. (Psalm 23:4 NIV)

Father God, help me to remember that I am never really alone. Even on my darkest night, you are with me and are close like no other. You know what it means to grieve, and you are healing my heart, step by small step. Thank you for surrounding and comforting me with your peace that surpasses my earthly understanding.

Worship Resource – Goodness of God

Pat Elsberry is an author, speaker, blogger, and a passionate advocate for parents dealing with grief after the loss of a child. Pat created multiple social media groups focused on providing hope to others who are walking the same path, including her blog, Hope During Loss. Pat facilitates an in-person grief share for women who have experienced child loss, and is also a moderator for Team Sharing, a nationwide peer-led support group for parents who have lost children to substance use disorder. Pat is the author of Beautifully Broken: Finding Hope During Loss, and will soon release her first devotional, Comforted by God. Pat and her husband, Fred live outside Atlanta and have a blended family of 7 children and 5 grandchildren. Her favorite things include traveling, cooking, gardening, dark chocolate, and worship music. You can find Pat on her blog, www.hopeduringloss.com, and on Facebook and Instagram @HopeDuringLoss.

Broken, Bent And Battered

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Posted by Erin Roberson, April 26, 2023

There is a pear tree in our neighbor’s yard that just looks pitiful! When I look at it, I think of three words - broken, bent, and battered.

You know what’s really amazing about this sad-looking tree? It continues to produce pears each year!

I’m wondering if you ever feel like that tree? Have the storms of life torn away some of your limbs? Maybe it’s the loss of a job, perhaps there have been broken relationships, or financial struggles may be causing constant stress.

Are you feeling beaten and battered by a serious illness, a challenging situation in your family, a difficult work environment, or even by your church?

Have you lost a limb because of an unexpected death, a child who is no longer connected to the family, the loss of something that was an important part of your life, or an estranged friendship?

Guess what! Jesus heals broken, bent, and battered people and works through them to accomplish His plans. If you think others see you as useless and dead (or even if you feel that way yourself), Jesus can restore you to wholeness, and He can use you to produce good fruit.

I’m reminded of the story of the Samaritan woman at the well. You probably know the story recorded in John 4. Jesus was traveling with his disciples through Samaria. He stopped at a well in a small town called Sychar. A Samaritan woman arrived at the well. She was definitely broken, bent, and battered.

First, she was coming to the well by herself in the heat of the day, which indicates that she was an outcast. She had been married five times and was living with a man who was not her husband. None of these things prevented Jesus from inviting this woman into a relationship with Him. He offered her “living water” and eternal life. Not only did she receive a new, abundant life, but she also told others about Jesus and “many of the Samaritans from that town believed in him because of the woman’s testimony” (John 4:39).

If you are feeling like that broken, bent, and battered pear tree, take heart! It doesn’t matter if your wounds were caused by your own choices, if they are due to someone else’s mistakes, or if life’s storms have left you looking tattered. You can experience a beautiful journey of healing through Jesus.

The things that have happened to you don’t have to be your identity. Believe who God says you are.

Through Jesus, you can be…

Child of God (John 1:12)

Chosen (John 15:16, 1 Peter 2:9)

Made in God’s Image (Genesis 1:27)

Known by God (Jeremiah 1:5)

Loved (Galatians 2:20)

Jesus’ Friend (John 15:15)

God’s Handiwork (Ephesians 2:10)

Citizen of Heaven (Philippians 3:20, 1 Timothy 1:7)

Raised in Christ (Colossians 3:1-4)

Conqueror (Romans 8:37)

Fearfully and Wonderfully Made (Psalm 139:14)

New Creation (2 Corinthians 5:17)

Check out this amazing song…

My Jesus

Erin Roberson is a wife and mother of two wonderful grown boys. She is a lifelong educator who loves learning and teaching others. She believes our primary focus should be on our relationship with God, learning who God is, who God says we are, and how God wants us to live.