Praying for Ketchup

The earth is the LORD's, and everything in it, the world, and all who live in it.

Ps. 24:1

Our conversation jumped around all over the place as we had much to pack into this little window of time. It had been almost two years and our hearts continued to be knit together because of our love for God. We hung onto each other’s words knowing that as we spoke we were not only pouring out, but also filling up each other’s heart.

Hers had been a very difficult two years which included uprooting her family and moving to a new city, compounded by many physical and spiritual battles. She had sought out the answers to her physical issues but those answers were delayed. Her husband had fought the battle with her and had been the rock for the family. When her faith slowly evaporated, his sustained her. After another move, and a new set of doctors, healing came and peace returned.

As I sipped my coffee, a little string of her words stirred something within me. I knew God was speaking when the tears threatened to spill into my coffee. It was simple and even said with a hint of humor, but touched my heart.

“After years and years of living by raising support for ministry, I was so excited that our life was changing and there would be a small salary and I no longer had to pray for ketchup. I am so tired of praying for ketchup.”

“Praying for ketchup?’ I asked.

“Yes, I was looking forward to living more comfortably where I didn’t have to pray if there was enough money for ketchup. ”

I definitely understood what she was saying as I had known their life of dependence on God for everything. But I also knew that God had more to say to me. It is easy to quickly dismiss this kind of emotion that comes from a ketchup statement, but I am training my heart to ask God what is going on within. I want to stay tender to His Spirit and allow Him to speak any way that He chooses. Before I left the parking lot, I made a few notes in my phone and proceeded to my next appointment in deep conversation with God.

I never pray for ketchup! I live a comfortable life and have what I need and much of what I want. I add to my grocery cart what I want and realize I have forgotten the days when I dug under the couch cushions to find a few more coins to buy only the essentials. I like it better this way than the early married years. I like getting the shoes and clothes and food and extras that I want when I want. I like a life filled with ketchup.

If you have the time and patience look back at my last paragraph and count all of the “I’s”. I think you will find 12. Much of our lives are still filled with self…me, my, I!

"I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself up for me. Gal. 2:20

Truth be told, the fight of mankind is to be self-reliant and self-sufficient, in need of nothing. We quickly move from knowing we are totally dependent on God to living for ourselves.

We don’t like to have need that presses us to live disciplined lives that are totally dependent on God.

My friend had learned the lesson. God is the provider of all. He owns it all. As we submit to Him and acknowledge all of our need, He always provides. She had learned from the life of strict discipline…ketchup comes from God. He gives all that we need and in His time and His way, He blesses with the little extras just because he is a good, good Father that delights in giving to His children.

I confessed the truth found within my heart and declared to God that I want to live needy and dependent on Him for everything. I then began to rejoice in Ps. 23:1

“Because the Lord is my Shepherd; there is nothing that I lack;

In Him. I have everything that I need.”

Keep me needy Lord!

“Lord, may I have some ketchup please”

Rip That Chapter Out!

Digging through my tightly stacked bookshelf, I finally spotted the desired book. The well worn “Becoming a Vessel God Can Use” by Donna Partow, is one that I have read and taught numerous times. Many sentences are underlined, highlighted, and starred as if the more that I marked, the more the truth would get into my heart. Loose pages were falling out and some were even missing. Entire chapters hung by loose threads, threatening to completely fall out.

Carefully thumbing through the tattered book reminded me of a speaking opportunity I had a couple of weeks ago. I presented my story as a book. All of our lives are like books stacked on a bookshelf. When we give our lives to Christ, Our story becomes His Story written through the details of our lives. As we surrender, we give the pen to Him to write whatever He wants, knowing that oftentimes it doesn’t look like a good plan.

As in any book, there are chapters that are wordy and honestly kind of boring. Then come the cliffhangers that thrust us to peek ahead into the coming pages to see what is next. Some chapters we want to rush through and get on to what is next and yes, there are some that we want to totally rip out.

Thumbing through the pages of our books of life we might find chapters titled pain, destruction, abuse, addiction, rebellion, death, divorce, or infertility. How would our story read if these chapters were not included? Some of those chapters are a result of living in a fallen world, but if we are honest, we all have chapters that we wrote ourselves with the help of our enemy. We made the horrible choices that led to sometimes long unwanted chapters. The embarrassment, humiliation and consequences leave us begging, “Rip That Chapter Out”!

But then would I really choose that if it were even possible?

Would I be who I am today, if I had not gone through those things? Especially with the promise of Romans 8:28!

And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.

After my speaking, gathered in little circles sharing our hearts, a dear friend shared a beautiful perspective. It went something like this:

“Martha, I don’t think I would really want to rip the chapter out. I hate what I did; what I went through, but it was in that experience that I met Him as my Shepherd. Oh, I had read about the Shepherd and heard messages about the good shepherd. I loved the poetry of the beautiful Psalms 23. but lying in my hospital bed that night, the Shepherd stepped into my room, opened His robe and pulled me up close to his pierced side. Wrapping His robe back around me, He then held me. It was the most beautiful experience ever. If I ripped out that horrible chapter in my life and threw it away, then I would also have to rip out “My Shepherd”.

I would never choose to loose that.”

Wow! What a new awakening came to my heart! My perspective changed as I began to see the chapters of my story being renamed.

“DEATH OF HUSBAND” renamed “THE LORD, MY HUSBAND”.

“ABUSE” renamed “CHERISHED”

“DIVORCE” renamed “ALL SUFFICIENT ONE”

“REJECTION” renamed “MINE”

“FINANCIAL SCARE” renamed “MY PROVIDER”

“STUPID DECISIONS” renamed “FORGIVENESS”

On and on it goes. Every experience in life is an opportunity to know God in a new way. These chapter changes actually change the title of my book from “My Story” to “His Story”.

It is in the darkest places and most horrendous experiences that we come to know Him in ways we have never known. It is then we can join in with Job and say: -

My ears had heard of you but now my eyes have seen you. Job 42:7

Write on Lord! I can hardly wait to meet you in the next chapter.

Agreeing With God

We gathered for the purpose of prayer. We had studied prayer. We had talked about prayer. We had even prayed but this call to prayer was different. We wanted Him to come close and purify our hearts. As long as we keep our prayers surface, we will never know the power of His cleansing blood.

Prayers of confession and repentance began to spill out of our hearts and through our lips as we sat in His presence. We believed his word that says, “Confess your sins to one another so that you may be healed.” One after another confessions were made. None were forced but prodded by the Holy Spirit. It was deep, pure, in many cases gut-wrenching. One confession gave way for another. Repentance came and forgiveness came followed by great rejoicing. There is power in agreeing with God.

God has used Martha Kilpatrick as a powerful tool in my life. Today I would like to share an excerpt from one of her many booklets “Seeing Him”. (Can be ordered here: http://livingchristianbooks.com/seeing-him-martha-kilpatrick/ )

The Holy Spirit comes and that is His place. His purpose is to bring to you the truth.

At that point, the ball is in your court and you choose how you respond. You can say, “Yes…” or you can say, “Oh, but….!” Or “Don’t you see?” or “Don’t you understand?”

The ball is in your court.

You decide whether you drop the ball at that point – or whether you give the ball back to God and the game goes on.

Most people drop the ball at that point. I want to tell you, they do.

Only when you admit the truth of which the Holy Spirit convicts you, do you give Him back the ball. And do you know what He does with it?

He unveils the Son.

He unveils His Son to you and then you love Him.

You have a new revelation of Him and you love Him and then…you surrender.

Repentance is the door to God.

Repentance is the door…to seeing God.

Do you understand the game now? Let’s go back over it.

God takes the ball and throws it to you and says:

“This is you! This is the truth about YOU.”

And you can say, “Oh, but…no!” and you drop the ball.

The game ends right there.

Or you say, “Yes, Lord, I see. I repent.” You throw the ball back to Him.

He gives you a revelation of Christ.

He throws the ball back to you and you love Him and you surrender.

You throw the ball back to Him…

You are ready then for the next game because it is a cycle that goes on and on and on through life. Those who drop the ball break the cycle and never come to this kind of love that I have presented to you here – the kind of burning, intense love for Christ.

So you see, you really have to learn how to repent.

The cycle goes on and on, deeper and deeper, more and more.

Your repentance is deeper.

Your vision is higher.

Your love is richer,

and your surrender is lower.

Repentance, revelation, love, surrender.

Your vision of Christ is proportionate to your assuming responsibility for: who you are, what you are, what you have done, and what you can do.

Your life will pivot on your repentance.

Your life will turn;

Your life will fall;

Or your life will rise…on your repentance.

And your love for Christ will precisely equal your repentance.

So, you want to see Him more? Agree with Him more!

Lord, move our hearts to quickly agree with You about our sin that we may confess and repent. We want to see you Lord. More Lord!